Sometimes it takes courage to honestly say what's happening in a relationship.

Tonight I'm doing that with someone who's important to me. It's hard to tell him how I really see things, but there's a release and an inner sense that it's the right thing to do. I'm waiting for it to be time to call him (different time zones are hard!).

For too long in my marriage, I was willing to avoid facing the true state of things. I have learned from that, and now I'm just not able to avoid the truth, even when it hurts. I'm far from perfect, but I did learn a few things from the marriage and divorce.

I'm not sure if I'm writing about a "breaking up" or a "coming together"...impossible to know at this point. But I do know that I'm unwilling to settle for less than the truth in my relationships now.

I have great clarity about what is right for me in this situation. It does hurt to realize that I might "lose" this person, if only temporarily, from speaking the truth to him, but I have to do it.

I think I'll sleep better once we've had this talk. I keep thinking about the phrase "speak the truth in love." I hope I can do it. Theoretically I can, but in the moment, will I lose my resolve and melt when I hear his soft voice on the phone?